Let's get this thread to a million pages!

[Mia]

The first 10000 posts I made were counting all kinds of different things

[Mia]

There once was a gal named Mia. Mia had a very troubled life, but always stuck it out. In recent times though, Mia began to act Different. She became cold and distant to people she once called friends. Eventually, one fateful day, one of her friends would get attacked by her. She received several bruises, and would eventually call the authorities. Mia would have to dotime for her actions. Now that she had to spend the next month in jail, Mia began to get desparate.

That would be until she met Camer the Dragon, who promised to bust her out of jail under one condition. Acquire 200 liters of cola, and bring it to his lair. "That's no trouble at all," Mia thought. She knew of a village where you could exchange goods. That is when Camer roared "If you don't acquire the cola I desire within 3 days, I'll burn you to a crisp!" Mia trembled a bit, but pressed on. She started walking down a trail towards Jiggmin's Village, in search of the cola she required.

Along the way, she found some abandoned goods at a nearby tree. "This is perfect," Mia exclaimed. "Surely something of this will be tradeable for the cola." That's when she noticed something with a strange shiny aura. It appeared to be some sort of a Silky Silver, made for crafting exquisite swords to defend Jiggmin's Village. It was highly valued. That is when a dangerous looking orc named Addy showed up out of nowhere. "Hey, that stuff belongs to me! Hand it over or I'll bash you with my club!"

Luckily for Mia, she knew that the sun was rising very soon. This particular race of orcs was afraid of Sunlight, so she tried to stall the orc. "Hey orc, you're right! How can we settle this, human to orc? Perhaps we play a quick game of parcheesi to pass the time!" The orc laughed at her. "You doofus, I don't have time for your foolish human games! I have to get back to my home to protect mys- uh, I mean... cook dinner for my family! Yeah, that's it!" That's when the sun started rising above the horizon.

"Nice try, but I know this Sunlight is absolutely unbearable to you!" Mia said smugly. The orc wailed "Gahhh, forget it! Just keep the stuff! I gotta get out of here!!!" and scurried back home. Mia gleefully continued down the trail, until she finally reached Jiggmin's Village. She managed to find a shopkeeper that traded consumables. "Hello, traveler, my name is Ashley! Take a look at my goods, and see if there's anything you like!" Mia scanned her eyes across the entire stock, until she spotted it in the corner.

There were bottles upon bottled stacked up on wooden pallets. There had to be at least 400 liters of cola there! Mia breathed a sigh of relief, and said "How about we work out a trade? I have a large quantity of Silky Silver in my possession, and would be willing to trade it for half of your stock of cola." Ashley thought it over, and considering the extraordinarily high value of Silky Silver, agreed. That's when Mia's heart sank. How would she get all of this cola back to the dragon's lair in time? She's not able to lift all of this cola there by herself!

That is when a Bluecat entered the shop and began pawing at a ball of yarn Mia had collected from the tree. "Meow meow meow meow!" said the Bluecat, but luckily Mia knew how to speak cat. He wanted the ball of yarn so badly, he was willing to give up his bed for it! "Meow meow meow meow!" said the cat. This time, the cat said he's been sleeping in a wagon with a blanket, but would gladly find somewhere else to sleep if it had the yarn to play with! Mia's eyes lit up, and agreed to the trade. Now she had a way of getting the cola back to Camer the Dragon!

Mia thanked Ashley the shopkeeper and the Bluecat, and hurried back to the dragon's lair. With just enough time to spare to eat a dozen donuts from a travelling cart, she made it there. Mia was exhausted, but there was the lair! "Hey, you humans are pretty cool! And here I was, practicing my biggest fire breaths to burn you with." said Camer. He threw 198 liters of the cola back into his pile of treasure, and cracked open one of the 2 liters. Mia had escaped with her freedom, and avoided the wrath of the dragon!

The end

@Different Did you see the story I wrote? Incorporated the top 9 posters in this thread

[Mia]

I don't even remember counting some of these things

[Sunlight1232]

Honestly if I had won the spamming competition I feel like it would be me getting voted out instead of Addy right now.

[Sunlight1232]

Hard to recover when your own team unanimously votes you out.

[Sunlight1232]

His coconut gun can fire in spurts.
If he shoots ya, it's gonna hurt!

[Mia]

There's a ton of posts where I didn't count anything at all

[Mia]

My record long 2434 post spam session, I didn't count anything most of the time. So 2400 posts are just... number

[Mia]

A hippo shredding its poop by pressing its tail against its buttcrack

Why did I say that lol

[Mia]

I have made more posts in this thread in 2026 than I did from 2019-2025

[Mia]

I made more posts in this thread in the past 2 months than I did in the previous 7 years

[Mia]

Almost 5000 of my posts were hammers, which was my most counted thing at the time

[Mia]

14504, switched back to counting taytos after only counting it for the first 26 posts I made in this thread

[Mia]

Lousy generic filler post

[Mia]

Just for shiggles, I did this...

[Mia]

When I counted things

taytos: Posts 1-26, 14504-16413, 16765-17016, 17044-23187
lousy products: Posts 27-53
dreams: Posts 54-927, 930-2053, 2131-2365
#/#: Posts 928-929, 2054-2130, 2513-5152
exact doubles: Posts 2366-2509
#: Posts 2510-2512, 5972-7848, 7925-9820, 17017-17043
rifles: Posts 5153-5415
lost brain cells: Posts 5416-5971, 7849-7924
hammers: Posts 9821-14503
server crashes: Posts 16414-16764
donuts: Posts 23188-30050
penguins: Posts 30051-Present

[Mia]

Counting Leaderboard (as of this very post)

taytos - 8332 Posts
donuts - 6863 Posts
hammers - 4683 Posts
# - 3803 Posts
#/# - 2719 Posts
dreams - 2233 Posts
lost brain cells - 632 Posts
server crashes - 351 Posts
rifles - 263 Posts
exact doubles - 144 Posts
penguins - 49 Posts
lousy products - 27 Posts

[Mia]

That took forever to go through all of the posts, but now it won't be even worse in the future

[Mia]

Here's what the Acid Forums one would've looked like at this point:

slices of pie: Posts 67-2650, 14043-17461
foxes: Posts 2651-2657
#/#: Posts 2658-2660, 2723-2752
is a mystery: Posts 2661-2722, 2753-2867
arrows: Posts 2868-14042, 20292-29070
massages: Posts 17462-19978
borks: Posts 19979-20291
sparrows: Posts 29071-29917, 29920-29928, 29933-Present
klingons: Posts 29918-29919
raccoons: Posts 29929-29932

At my current count then, I had just switched to sparrows. And arrows was dominating the leaderboard with a whopping 19954 posts. Next highest was slices of pie at 6003 posts, then massages at 2517 posts, then it trails off to really small numbers

[Mia]

30102 penguins

I probably can't spam for long